Counting My Blessings - Reflections of 2020 (Part 3 of 3)
As much as 2020 is a disaster year to most by most standards, I think I have been very lucky and I count my blessings:
1. Julian and family - it really takes a village to raise a child
Despite my wife suffering a prolonged painful labor, Julian was born safe and healthy - big thanks to our experienced and skilful gynae. Julian has been growing well since - he has been consistent in the growth metrics percentile. Of course dealing with Julian has not been a bed of roses (see Reflections Part 1), but by and large, he’s growing well and healthy. My wife has also recovered from her tormented labor (though she still sometimes complains about a particular midwife who attended to her that night/morning) and thankfully has none of the post-labor complications in horror stories we hear sometimes.
Raising a child, especially a newborn is the ultimate team work. From the pre-natal tonics supplied by my mother to the pre and post natal (confinement) nutritious meals prepared by mother in law, it REALLY takes a village to raise a child. I must really give tremendous credit and thanks to my mother in law for her presence, sacrifices and effort in raising Julian so far. She was only meant to stay at ours and help out in the 1-month confinement period. Unfortunately or fortunately, due to circuit breaker, she couldn’t go back to work - she ended up helping us beyond till..... now. Of course, credit must also be given to my father-in-law for his support. I can't be more thankful.
2. Joining Ecommerce......and a great team
I joined the ecommerce industry in Nov 2019 and Covid19 broke out in early 2020. And oh boy am i lucky. Most things went into meltdown - at least in the beginning - travel, hospitality, events, retail, supply chain, etc and only a few things went into overdrive - masks, sanitizers, ZOOM and yes ecommerce. Consumers could only buy their stuff online when the non-essential services and retail were closed - and when offline stores are shut, companies scrambled to sell their stuff online.
I know of folks who had to take pay cuts, involuntary no-pay-leave and uncertainty over their job security. I was even lucky enough to get a small bonus and (tiny) pay increment. In the grand scheme of things, there has probably never been a better time to be in ecommerce and I have been truly blessed.
When I first joined the company, many friends asked me how the culture is like. And I told them a big component of your experience depends on your immediate team and leader. Coming from startup environment and relatively smaller companies, I’ve always been skeptical of corporate culture in bigger organizations. However, everyone in this team which I joined have been nothing but fantastic. And I say this without any single shred of political correctness.
Very early on after I joined, my managers went the extra mile to get an early confirmation for me - so that I could enjoy the company’s paternity benefit. I was new and relatively untested - and they didn’t have to, yet they took that risk to ‘fight’ for me. They were accommodating to my new life being a father - and never had I once felt like I had to choose between work or family. I felt my immediate colleagues and I have complementary skill sets, experience and personalities. Individually we’re quite different, but as a team, we were very complementary. My direct counterpart is very capable, open to teach and share, despite being relatively younger. The direct colleague jumped in to help when I spearheaded a project which needed her expertise. My direct line manager hired me knowing I would be a rank higher than him (this is not common at all); and when I asked him why he said it was not a problem for him and his hiring policy is he looks out for skills and experience complementary to the existing team. I have also learnt a lot from him - esp. his organized and structured way of thought and his cool and collected way of managing internal communication and meetings. I honestly lucked out and can’t be more thankful for having such teammates.
P.S. At end of 2020, I have transferred internally to another team - the New Retail team. That’s another story for another day.
3. Being able to share my experiences and help others
Relationships is key to happiness and qualify of life. In 2020, I have officially affirmed and embraced it. I do keep in touch with friends and check in on them occasionally via text / DM. In 2020, I also have had friends and acquaintances reach out - for various reasons including asking for advice on:
job hunting (how to start, what to consider, how to 'sell' yourself on CV, how can one join technology sector, etc)
switching industry at work (from headhunting to BD, from managing brand at distributor to being a key account manager at an ecommerce platform)
how to exit from one's own startup you co-founded (what and how to negotiate with co-founders, exit plan, how to put a monetary value to your past years of blood, sweat and tears, looking beyond the emotional, what to look out for in next step, etc)
what to consider when switching companies - i.e. sorting out career moves
ideas to increase and improve businesses, etc
And 2020 isn't the first or only year the above happened. I've always been open to listen - esp. when it comes to friends' career moves. And why?
It all starts from understanding how shitty / alone I myself had felt when i was at certain crossroads (e.g. I switched from banking to starting a laser tag business when I was 27) and being empathetic to any one else feeling the same. I also feel I have been lucky to have had some 'mentors' or 'gurus' in my life who have helped me at some point and I just want to pay it forward. And lastly, the truth is also that I I enjoy it. I enjoy the process of sharing my experience and I think each time I do so, it gives me certain affirmation and some new perspective I may have not thought about. It's a blessing being able to help and it inherently gives me joy.
Note to self: Regardless how each year goes, I want to always be able to look back and count my blessings in all situations and be grateful for things. (I also read happiness is correlated to gratefulness.) I do not want to take things for granted and I must remember how under-rated the role of luck/chance/timing sometimes plays in our lives in the grand scheme of things. (Yes fortune favors the brave, but there are many many things - good and bad - which happen in our lives the way they do for many unknown/unexplained reasons.) I am not and I certainly do not want to become the person who credits himself and his own efforts for every good thing that happens (and others for every bad thing that happens).
I also quote my good friend Jonathan who kinda summed it up quite nicely “Happiness is how you psycho yourself to like the situation you are in”.
Here's to a healthy, happy and prosperous 2021!
